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Class of 1989
THEY DID NOT KNOW: I would earn a Masters in Clinical Social Work - Because 'THEY' said I would not graduate high school !!!!! Because when I did graduate high school, I needed to find my own way , so I joined the Navy. Because after leaving the Navy and becoming a divorced ,single mother to two small children , they made sure to shun me in church and told others to cease helping. Because they said at age 30 I would never make it through Nursing School , and I should just move to Pembroke Projects. Because they said going back to finish a Bachelor Degree in Clinical Counseling Psychology was a waste of time , I was too ambitious and dressed like I had money forgetting my "place". Because They, said Graduate School was an expensive and selfish move on my part because of my eldest also being in college and I was being a bad mother. Yes , in fact , they said I needed to take the chance at that mentally abusive relationship and get married to that rich man because I was not as young or pretty anymore , and I was lucky any man wanted me, since I had baggage. Oh man , THEY HAD A LOT TO SAY ABOUT THINGS THEY REALLY were not well informed about. They didn't know every word of stone they casted at me , no matter how they hurt, could never harm me. They didn't know that those very mean nasty stones would one day be used as fuel, and would one day become my armor of determination and fortress of tenacity. They didn't know that I was NOT fashioned to BREAK!! They didn't know despite 3 nervous break downs , two repossessed cars, a home foreclosure, major surgical procedures , abandonment by friends , the church folks, loved ones , and my daughters' fathers who chose not to pay child support for 12 years , I would become even more focused and would not let these vicissitudes stop me from finishing the race. They did not know I would receive scholarships , make great friends , have new family CHOOSE TO love me , I would meet Gloria Steinem , and dozens of other women would follow my example and return to school. They did not know my eldest daughter would excel in college by being on the Dean's list , national honor society , Vice President of the French Club and a student Senate Chairperson . She would accomplish these and more because long before she got to ESU, the college environment was familiar to her due to the fact she and her little sister were going to college classes with my for years!! They didn't know Cidnee Allison would attend PennState at 15 years old and challenge the status quo. Yes Lord , THEY did not know there would be poured out upon me the blessing of transformation in my heart, that self love and increased faith , were being birth through the fire of it all . They did not know I would cease to be CONCERNED about what they THOUGHT THEY knew and focus on what Christ had to say about the plans He had for my life before He created me !!!!Jer29:11 ????. THEY did not know others were waiting in the wings to love, encourage, sacrifice , and pray for me!!!!. How could they know When They DIDN'T KNOW ME???? They only knew their own limitations to love themselves or others and how they saw little value in me . They only knew from birth they willfully CHOSE to discount , disinvite, ridicule , and reject me. THEY DIDN'T KNOW THE MIRACLE OF RESTORATION AND ACCEPTANCE WAS IN THE FIRE!!!!!they didn't know their inability to love me would produce a passion for compassion and unconditional positive regards for others in my heart . They didn't know that I would serve others through my Nursing and Counseling due to all THEY DID NOT KNOW! Guess what ? I forgive THEM- because, they didn't know and many days along this 16 year journey, neither did I .......But , God knew all along and now , WE know...!!#NUFFSAID!