The year 1996 finds Mike Schmidt head photographer for playboy, in gay paree, on an assignment photographing top models. His 1st subject, Debbie Schurman, was limited to only turtle necks. Vivian Flett, Twiggy's look alike, was sick, so he did a series on Deb Sexton, "The body babe from NY”. Bridget O'Brien, another member of Mike's staff, could not accompany him because she was back in NY working with chemicals in the darkroom waiting for something to develop.
It is time for them to return and Julie Jirik, the captain of their ship the Titanic 242, greeted them as they were boarding. We all know that a good place to find fascinating people is on board an ocean liner. The five day cruise gave them ample opportunity to meet such world-wide known people as the new Pope, Kevin Tesh, and his newly elected director of convents; Mother Superior, Veronica Swalboki, and her faithful assistant nun, Sister Lisa Anderson. Other famous faces were Paul Lockey, Ambassador to the US from New Zealand, Dave Richter, head supervisor of the Soviet Union's collective farms, Professor of English Don Romer, who has just completed his latest novel "Trust Me", and Jamie Rundell, champion weight lifter. Quick, look over there, who is that mask man? It's not your basic Lone Ranger, it looks to me like, no it couldn't be, it's Superman in disguise and under it all is no other than our own Davey Burns. On top of all that we find Jim Swartezer, practicing his uncontrollable mountain climbing on board the ship now working his way to the top of the mast going after Wonder woman Sue Weiland. At the top who goes skating by but Mary Cambell, the roller derby queen of New Orleans. Also on board the ship you can find anyone from an Avon salesman Keith Barnes, to such sport figures as the Olympic gold medal winner of hopscotch, Colleen Boll, and the foosball wizard Jerry Fiecke, who will practice only at the Hollywood Sports Complex. What’s that tree doing on board the ship, "Don't you know that's the Keebler Cookies Tree" replied a bystander, "and if you knock on the door you can meet the elf inside, Jeff Havlik."
Due to prevailing winds their course has been changed and instead of docking in NY they end up in Los Angelis where Joel Salonek, the parking lot attendant, directs them to studio 4 so Mike can check over the new movie his company is financing, entitled "The Cheerleaders, part II" starring Joan Addicks, and Sherry Schroeder. The Broadway hit "Hair" is also in the process of production with Lewis Chadwick, as lead performer. Universal Studios is a large complex so Mike & Deb have a chance to take in many other filming's. They saw the new Tidybowl Man, Rick Schwalbe, who's only goal in life is to stamp out (mold & mildew.) The Elvis Presley of the 90's, Pete Akins, is also doing a cut on his latest album. You all are aware that Mary Hartman, was picked up for cocaine and due to insanity was replaced by our own actress of the year, Cathy Schmidt, in the new series, “Cathy Schmidt”. A good friend & co-worker of hers, Kathy Frevert, Miss Romper Room, is often heard mumbling, "Romper bomper stomper boo tell me tell me tell me true." Another crowd pleaser, Mr. Whipple, Alias Jerry Peterson, is seen squeezing the Charmin.
Next door at Warner Brothers they are working on the next Roadrunner cartoon with Gerry Gallus as sound effects man; you know that infamous beep-beep. Next they see Mickey Mouse's spouse Minnie, yet the same Minne as in Sutherland. The list is never ending with such characters as the daring but innocent Pipi Long stocking, Debbie Knott. Cinderella, Becky Anderson, and her step-sisters, Debbie Bury, and Mary Hissam. The Wizard of Oz was due for a new casting, Scott Tegland, is the new scarecrow, Jeff Bittner, is the Tin man, Toney Blackketter, as the Lion, Marbeth Amundson, as Dorothy and those playful little munchkins, Penny Schneider, & Dixie Steffenson. Time to be moving homeward to the Midwest.
On the plane, piloted by Jeff Wall, who sells red light bulbs on his off hours and his copilot, Don Gallus, who drives a Schmidt beer truck on his time off, and we can't forget their lovely stewardess, Rita Danielson, cheerfully asking the passengers, "Coffee, tea or me,?? Well what would this flight be like without a stunning stewardess like her. Sitting across the aisle from them is Sue Venske, who has "No Fear of Flying".
Up in 1st class rumor has it that the 1996 calm cool collected and under control mother of the year award winner, Lorrie Flemming, is signing autographs and talking about Hans Widner, who has gone to Mars to take pictures for NASA because they were so impress with his pictures of the snowstorm in Germany. After crash landing in Como Park Zoo (thanks to the able minded pilots) we find Dean Bergstrom, head zookeeper, in utter hysteria over the bent lion cage. Wanting to escape the chaos, Deb and Mike take the first taxi in sight and find themselves cruising down Hennepin Avenue where Jeff Hoffman was last seen speeding away in his pink Cadillac because Jack Sondegard had just taken over his job at the Pink Pussy Cat Bar with his top pussy cats Mary Lyreck and Debbie Lobitz.
1996 also finds little Watertown up to suburban status with good old Hammerback still in business under the new ownership of Aggie Mader, expert in auto body painting & repair. For a bite to eat they whip over to the Dairy Queen and who should they find as the new co-managers but Cheryl Wegener and Renee Weinzierl. There are many new changes in the Watertown School system, Mr Younk was replaced by Craig Fautsch and Mrs. Palmquist has been replaced by Jan Van Gundy, to sort of keep things all in the family. Principals have to change too and the new one is, Lori Hinze. The new changes have also brought religion into the schools with Father Jacobek, Mike Bogatzki. Our school woods has switched a little, it's now a greenhouse with John Bogema and Grant Gabel, caring for their "cute" little plants, but what their growing exactly no one really knows. All they know is that they are good friends of the new managers of the Municipal Liquor Store. Joey Mauk, and Keith Miller.
This should make a good collection of personalities at the next reunion of the Class of ’76.