Joel Valenti

Union High School

Class of 1980

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Joel Valenti - Class of 1980 - Union High School

First Name	Joel
Last Name	Valenti
Graduation Year	Class of 1980
Gender	Male
Hometown	La Porte City, Iowa
Relationship Status	Married
About Me	I'm King of the World, chief of the Sea, I am the wind - at least I try to be... Joel Valenti was the role model for Batman. At an early age Joel Valenti discovered he could fly but kept it secret so as not to raise suspicion. Joel Valenti invented the internet. In many cultures “to Joel Valenti” means to sing like Joel Valenti. Joel Valenti once drove a car across the US on a single gallon of gasoline. Joel Valenti has an evil twin but nobody knows his whereabouts. Joel Valenti once went an entire week without breathing. Joel Valenti routinely eats a loaf of bread, 2 whole cows, 4 chickens, a turkey, 28 cookies, 10 pounds of potatoes and a six pack of diet Coke for lunch. Joel Valenti has the ability to defy gravity for extended periods of time. Joel Valenti does not use product to make his hair stand up straight. His hair is afraid to lay down. Joel Valenti has a wife and three children and incredibly enough they each have TEN fingers and TEN toes. Joel Valenti once went back in time and killed off all the dinosaurs. When angry, Joel Valenti can emit lasers from his eyes. Joel Valenti can play any instrument just by looking at it. Joel Valenti invented Braille. The French worship Joel Valenti. There is a tribe in the South American rainforest that believe that aliens visited Earth long ago and left Joel Valenti as a reminder. Joel Valenti once made love to Bigfoot. Twice in one night. Joel Valenti was the original choice for the Hugh Jackman role of Wolverine in the XMen but he kept tearing thru the suit. Joel Valenti was elected President of the United States on a write in vote in 2004 but declined to accept. Joel Valenti has won an Oscar, an Emmy, a Tony, and The Congressional Medal of Honor. In the same year. General Motors and Ford are vying for the rights to produce “The Valenti” – a supercharged sports car that can hit speeds in excess of 1000 miles per hour. Joel Valenti began walking at birth. Joel Valenti was the first man to swim around the world without using his arms. Joel Valenti can legally perform marriages anywhere in the world. Joel Valenti has a photographic memory and esp and knows what you’re thinking right now and will. Not. Forget. It. Chuck Norris does a really bad Joel Valenti impression. Joel Valenti once...(read more)