Eleanor Roosevelt High School Alumni
Greenbelt, Maryland (MD)
Josh Greenwald
Eleanor Roosevelt High School
Class of 2010
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JOSH'S PROFILE
| First Name | Josh |
| Last Name | Greenwald |
| Graduation Year | Class of 2010 |
| Gender | Male |
| Current Location | New York, New York |
| Hometown | Bowie, Maryland |
| Relationship Status | Single |
| About Me | How can I be this smart, good looking, funny, nice and great all at the same time? The world may never know. :) And I'm not conceited at all, to boot. I'm just gonna put Ricky Gervais (and other other good) quotes here. RG: Yeah, I'm an atheist. I mean...if there is a God...why did he make me an atheist? That was his first mistake. Actually, the Snake in the garden was his first mistake, but whatever. I told you, I'm really clever. RG: No. No, I don't want to go into it, but I'm not built. I'm 5 foot 8, it's all in proportion. Plus, if I was, it would just look weird. I'd faint when I got an erection, it's be so big. I mean, I'm not, I'm not incredibly small, but if you saw me you'd be like "Oh, look there's an averaged size penis." Now my balls, those are huge. Teacher: Principal Stanford, this boy was sleeping in my class. Asian Kid: I wasn't sleeping! I'm fucking asian! Ryan: It's fine for your voice to crack unless you're playing a Nazi. Caitlin (via a FB status): It made me wonder how many times we forgive just because we don't want to lose someone, even if they don't deserve our forgiveness. Andy: Who built this set?? Donna: Imaginary, invisible catholic friends suck. Zack Whedon: Yeah but I played the fuck out of that part. Andy: This might be a good time for me to sit on the couch and put my hand down my pants. And these are quotes from the Aloniz! final party sleepover/thingiemabobber. Josh: Tim, your head is like a boulder rolling down Indiana Jones' spine. Josh: Well I'm a republican. Anna: No, my bed isn't allowed to have political affiliations. Michael: Remember that time when Josh was like "I'm a republican? And then Anna was like "No, my bed can't be a republican!" Tim Baeder: How about we play the "shut the fuck up" game? Josh: No, there are only two things that don't exist. Dragons and the Holocaust. Abby: My eyes are fields of lettuce. Josh: Hey, have you seen Naveed? Anna: Yeah! I'm going to prom with him! Josh, No, no you're not. Anna: What? yeah, I am. He asked me. We're going! Josh: No, remember, your parents said no? Anna: Really? Well that sucks. Michael: Praise Mick! Josh: I'm not racist. I'm just truthful! Eliot: Peter Piper picked a poo! Josh: It's true, your voice is like honey on thunder, Mike. Justin: Yeah, it's smooth and boom boom. Anna: You're Brock O'Justin! Moses: So what if Hitler shows up? Josh: I'll go out front and save us. Anna: How? Josh: I'd take a bomb. I'd blow us both up and that would create a barrier between us and them. Eliot: Anna, don't go anywhere, you're too stupid. Josh: Winnie the Booh. Winnie the Booh. And Biglet too. Anna: Josh, it's Piglet. And Winnie the POOH. Justin: What if there was an ACTUAL owl city, where owls and fireflies could coexist? Josh: And the Fireflies would eat the owls! Abby: That already exists. It's called a forest! Eliot: You can't drive a mini cooper in a forest. Josh: Hey. Hey Tim? Do you find the term "ginger" offensive? Tim: Yes. Very. Josh: Do you find being a ginger offensive? Tim: No, not really. Josh: If you could be anything other than Ginger, would you switch IMMEDIATELY? Tim: Would you want to be something other than Jewish? Huh? Huh? Josh: Well during the 1940's, I'm pretty sure I would've wanted to be anything BUT Jewish. You know what I'm talking about. Eh? Eh? Abby: Sometimes when it's cold and rainy outside, I get some food. And I get some taquitos. And the a Mexican gives it to me. And then they mow my lawn. Tuh-ta-taquitos. Tuh-ta-taquitos. Josh: Ok, so the ballad of Paul Turner. So, it was back in 1990, and... Justin: Wait, he's really old! Josh: Shut up, now you've ruined it. So, it was 1989 and two parents were having sex. One of them was a white man, and one was a black woman. He was born and he had a unicycle... Abby: OH! I have a thing, I went to Church with him for three years! Josh: Shut the fuck up, that's not yet. Ok, he came out of the womb and he was riding a unicycle. And he had two black arms and no one liked him because of them. Justin: Wait, what color was the rest of him? Josh: Just go with it!! So he was born and went to Heather Hills Elementary School and no one was friends with him because.... Anna: Wait, I thought we liked him? Josh: No, in elementary school. No one liked him because he had an afro. An afro. Which comes from the word Nascar. Anna: L...(read more) |
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